Last night we had our first official "Student Group Leaders" meeting to discuss the merging of the undergrad and graduate groups. All of the group leaders were able to attend, even Yuan Yuan, who is in Seattle, joined us through Skype. It was great to have all in attendance and wonderful to see a group of people ready to serve God together. The meeting told me one thing: This year will be a long, hard transition process and in desperate need of God's grace and mercy...
The meeting went on for 4 long hours, as we struggled to cover the whole agenda. There were many disagreements that needed to be resolved and concerns that needed to be addressed. I was frustrated at times and literally felt my eyes popping out in disbelief how certain people can think so differently. I started to doubt my abilities in leading a Bible study group, as I was suddenly very aware of my age and spiritual maturity level amongst the leaders. When I promised to lead a group at the end of last semester, I knew I've never led a Bible study in the group, knew nothing of fancy commentaries, and famous Bible interpretations; I only knew I have a heart willing to serve. However, in the meeting last night it seemed like I need more than that, but do I?
What constitutes as a "good Bible study leader?" Instead of being influenced by the pride constantly surrounding us, what does GOD want in a Bible study leader? The meeting left me pondering on these thoughts. I am fully confident that God wants me to serve Him in this Chinese Bible study, but why am I constantly questioning my ability to serve? Why am I letting myself be influenced by the pride surrounding me? I don't know as much about the Bible as many of those I'm serving with, then why has God placed me in this serving position?
Am I really ready to battle?
